Not everything that is red is good. Fire ants, the little spot of red in our back garden, are most definitely not good. They've had there nasty little teeth (or whatever ants have -- pincers?) in my feet once too often this week.
Armed with a bottle of cheap vinegar, a hose pipe, and Justin's shoes (so as not to get my favourite red ones all anty), I set off in search of the Queen. And no, I wasn't going to offer her cucumber sandwiches.
Of course, no mission is complete without a band of trusty sidekicks. Bella, the scout, Tilly, the designated stamper (wearing thick protective wellies), and our mascot, one lucky Lego sheep, who may or may not have been lost in the grass along the way.
Success? I don't know. We saw a lot of ants, gave them a good pickling with vinegar, and retreated to wait for the next battle.
P.S. Wondering why vinegar? I read that vinegar confuses the ants' sense of who are their friends and who are their enemies, so they start to attack each other. Hopefully, they're wiping themselves out right this very second...